I have discovered that I am entirely to picky. and that I focus on all the wrong things. I am on this quest to find the perfect person to date, and it has had its ups and downs. The downs have been pretty bad, and the ups have been rather anti-climatic. I have met two really interesting men in the last week or so. I will admit that I met one online, and the other in a hip little pub on Mcadams. The problem? one is not perfect and the other is not age appropriate. So this leads me to two questions?
A) what is age appropriate for a 23 y/o with the world at her feet?
So how old is too old? is it OK for me to date someone who is 15 years more experienced in life then I am? Does it really matter so long as i laugh while with this person? All I know is that I cant stop thinking about this old guy....
But then I ask my self is laughter enough? and this leads us to question B and the other guy I met.....I laughed until I cried. I drank so much the world was blurry.
B) what is perfection for me???
How do I define perfection? I know I will never find absolute perfection....but there has to be something close to the perfect date for me.
And what about him was not perfect? he was smart, funny, attractive, etc....but there was just a little something missing. I suppose I will see him again, just to be sure....
and while on this....why am I looking for perfection at this point? really I just want to date, laugh, be happy, and meet good people. So why am I trying to define anything, when the last thing I want is a definition of what’s what with who. I am a free entity and would like to stay that way....I just want a part time boyfriend...not a husband, not perfection....just fancy free fun...someone to enjoy a few meals with, someone to dance with on Saturday nights, someone to watch a movie with and maybe wake up with a couple of morning a week. but that someone has to leave and let me be. they have to accept my need for my own space and time with my girls. someone who is not going to cry when I decide its time to move on. someone who understand that at first, this won't be exclusive. It takes time to be sure that one person is just the right one to give up the ability to dance with someone else....I am a bit leery about making any commitments right now....the best I can do at this point is the commitment to have fun....that’s what I have to offer....fun. laughter. energy. spontaneity. winks. and warm hugs.
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1 comment:
I feel your pain. I say go with your gut on the age thing. I dont think its bad for a girl to date an older guy, but I think if he's interested in someone that is more then 5 or 6 years younger then him then its a total red flag. He's not right in the head no matter how perfect he is.
I personally couldn't date anyone a 2 years younger than me. The maturity issue is a big one.
I dont think its wrong to look for the right things, even if it does wear you out a bit. Its hard to find the right person, but compromises can always be made. You should definitely not judge based on the first time out, unless its like an extreme situation
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